Monday, May 02, 2005

Those Bestial Swedes: 200 Animals Molested in Sweden Over 30 Years

The amazing thing is that in Sweden this type of behavior is not, apparently, against the law. As long as the animal is not harmed, the animal’s “significant other” can not be prosecuted. I guess that’s life in the socially progressive nation of Sweden.

So, in a land renown for its buxom blue-eyed blondes, what could possibly drive a man to take the equestrian arts to a level of depravity that would gag the Marquis de Sade? A physical appearance that would make Quasimoto feel like Mel Gibson? There’s always plastic surgery and in the great welfare state of Sweden, if a person is so facially deformed he’s forced to cruise for dates at a Nordic dairy farm I would guess he could probably get fixed for damn near free. Social awkwardness? Well, if a man was too awkward to ask a human female for a date, I certainly do not see how a bovine bestiality bender is going to increase his social standing at all. Feelings of inadequacy? Well, I’ve been to a farm in the spring season before and have had the misfortune of coming within eyeshot of a horse’s reproductive appendage. If a man has feelings of inadequacy, the last thing he needs to try to do is measure up to THAT, especially in a region like Scandinavia that is exceptionally susceptible to gender bending arctic breezes.


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